Our sauce base today is this organic, gluten-free hoisin sauce by Edward & Sons. (They also make great instant potatoes, by the way, as well as all-natural GFCF sprinkles for cupcakes.) [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change formulas without warning. Always check your labels!]

Note that not all of the Edward & Sons sauces are gluten free, just this one and their teriyaki sauce. And if you look closely at the bottle, you’ll also learn how to say “gluten free” in French! Actually, that may be “without wheat,” I’m not sure. Either way, “bleh” is an appropriate syllable for it, don’t you think? If you want to have a go at making an approximation of this sauce yourself, it’s mostly soy sauce (make sure yours is GF!), apple cider vinegar, sugar, orange juice, sesame oil, and Five Spice. An Asian-y barbecue sauce, really.

So pour out 1/4 cup of the hoisin sauce, and add 2 Tablespoons of honey…

…and 1 1/2 Tablespoons of Lea & Perrin’s worcestershire sauce.

Now, cut up about a pound of beef steak into bite-size pieces, and mix them in the bowl with the sauce. Give them as much time to marinate as you can, but don’t sweat it if it isn’t that long. Usually I end up just letting it sit long enough for me to cook the mushrooms. What mushrooms, you ask?

These mushrooms! Sautee 8 oz. of fresh mushrooms in some olive oil until they’re mostly cooked, a good 8-10 minutes.

While you wait, get out 1/2 cup of dried cranberries, and soak them in some water. I know I use cranberries a lot, but if you don’t like the taste you could always use dried cherries or even golden raisins instead.

Meanwhile, start cooking your rice. 1 1/2 cups of rice is a good complement for the amount of stir fry we’re making, but of course you could do more or less depending on how many people you’re trying to feed.

Man, I always forget how much mushrooms shrink when you cook them. Dump in your meat-sauce concoction and let the meat brown, stirring occasionally. I know it isn’t truly a stir fry unless you have it over very high heat and are stirring constantly, but that’s a bad idea here because it will burn off the sauce too quickly. I won’t tell if you won’t.

And just for a little crunch, let’s toast 1/2 cup of almonds and throw them in there too. I always stock both almonds and cranberries in the pantry, not only for cooking but for sprinkling on salads as well. If your preference is for walnuts, or cashews, or pine nuts, those are all fine and dandy too. It’s a stir fry, do whatever you want! The easiest way to toast the nuts is to microwave them in a bowl one minute at a time, tossing them gently in between, until they crunch when you bite them (instead of squeaking.)

We’re almost there! Drain the cranberries (or other dried fruit of your choice,) and dump them in the pan along with the almonds.

And that’s it! Serve over rice, and sit back and watch the smiles on their faces. Well, don’t sit back too long, you’ll want to eat your own before it gets cold.

Happy Eating!

The GFCF Lady’s beef stir fry

1/4 cup Premier Japan (Edward & Sons) Hoisin sauce
2 TBS honey
1 1/2 TBS Lea & Perrin’s worcestershire sauce
1 lb. beef steak
8 oz. mushrooms
1/2 cup dried cranberries
1/2 cup slivered almonds
1 1/2 cups rice

That there’s a dutch oven with some olive oil in it. You could technically do this in a crock pot, but I just can’t imagine why you would want to. Number one, a dutch oven distributes the heat more evenly than a crock pot, and number two, the heavy lid makes a tight seal and keeps all the moisture inside, while every crock pot I’ve ever seen lets the steam escape, sometimes splattering all over the counter in the process. And that’s just not cool.

Peel and quarter two onions. This is my absolute favorite part of the recipe, by the way. When they come out of the pot, all golden and soft… but wait, that’s not for hours yet, don’t let me get sidetracked.

Now, a lot of pot roast recipes out there will tell you to season the meat with a “ranch dressing packet.” There are lots of descriptive words I could use to tell you what I think about those things, but we’ll keep it family-friendly and go with “not GFCF” for now. Suffice it to say, it’s both cheaper and healthier to use real spices. All you need is one Tablespoon each of celery salt (which is just salt and celery seed mixed together, if you happen to already have the latter in your spice drawer,) parsley, and chives.

Mix the spices on a plate and just lay the roast right on top of them. I usually do about a 2-3 lb. piece of meat, but you could certainly choose a bigger one if you wanted. Rotate it around on all sides, and press the spices in firmly so they stick.

Now, sear each side of the meat on high heat until it’s browned. You may feel kind of silly holding a huge piece of meat up on its end for a minute or two, but it’s important to get the edges too, and try as I might, I’ve never had a roast that would balance on its own.

Then set it aside on a plate, just for a second.

Measure out 2 cups of Pacific Foods organic beef broth, which is gluten-free. (But don’t take my word for it, always double-check your labels.)

See all those brown bits that stuck to the pan when we were searing the meat? We don’t want to waste them because they taste awesome. So pour just a tiny stream of broth into the pot to deglaze it. (It’s always seemed to me that we’re creating a glaze, not de-glazing anything, but those fancy chefs on the TV all tell me I’m wrong.) It’ll boil and spatter for a minute, and then the bottom of the pot will be magically clean.

Then set your meat back in the pot, pour the rest of the broth in, and place your onion quarters in around the sides. Mmm, cooked onions…

Top with carrots, put the lid on, and cook in a 275 degree oven for 3-4 hours. Normally people use baby carrots for this sort of thing, but we just love the matchsticks. Any shape will work, even those cute little flowers they cut them into at fancy restaurants. But don’t expect that kind of artistry out of me.

Just take a look at that deliciousness! Sure, sure, the meat’s good too, but do you see those onions? I could seriously just eat all the onions out of the pot and leave the rest for everyone else. But that would be a bad idea. Still, it’s tempting.

A quick tip: if your meat is tough, that does not mean it’s overcooked–it actually means it hasn’t been cooked long enough. The longer you cook it, the more of that connective tissue will break down, which is precisely why tough cuts of meat like this are always slow-cooked. I lived through many a tough pot roast, cooking them for less and less time, until I finally figured out I was going in the wrong direction.

But the onions were always good!

Happy Eating!

The GFCF Lady’s Pot Roast

2-3 lb. beef roast
1 TBS celery salt
1 TBS parsley
1 TBS chives
2 cups Pacific Foods beef broth
2 onions
1 cup carrots

Let’s make some tacos! You have three options for the wrapper: a 100% corn crunchy shell, a 100% corn soft tortilla, or… these crazy things. They’re corn tortillas, but they’re from “sprouted corn.” Basically it means they grind the corn up later in the growth process, so the plant is more mature and it’s had longer to build up more nutrients. I dunno, we like them mostly because the texture is much thicker and chewier, like a flour tortilla, rather than those translucent corn tortillas that tear if you look at them funny. Plus, the GFCFHusband says normal corn tortillas taste like lard and he hates them.

Anyway, they’re in the freezer section of our health-food store. You can either microwave them, or go all fancy and toast them in a dry pan on the stove, whatever floats your boat.

Shred some cooked chicken, or brown some ground beef if you swing that way. If you season the meat, don’t use those pre-made “taco seasoning” packets, because they’re always full of gluten. You can easily put the spices together yourself–those things are basically just cumin, chili powder, maybe a little onion powder, and salt. My chicken up there? Totally unseasoned. This was a lazy, lazy night for me as I recall.

This fabulous stuff is mango pico de gallo (pico de gallo is just finely diced tomato, onion, cilantro, and jalapeno pepper, for you people who don’t live within spitting distance of the Mexican border.) It’s not hard to make, but it is a little time-consuming to chop everything up, so I’ll confess I usually buy it pre-made at our grocery store. Plain old diced tomato would work just fine too.

Sprinkle on some lettuce and you’re good to go! What these tacos really need is some avocado, but alas, I didn’t have any this night. That is a surprisingly rare occurrence, I should tell you. I almost always have guacamole in the house. You could also add refried beans, black beans, or mexican rice to bulk them up a bit, if you wanted.

Happy Eating!

Tacos

100% corn tortillas or tostadas
Shredded chicken or ground beef
(Season to taste with cumin, chili powder, onion powder, and salt)

Toppings:
Tomato
Lettuce
Avocado
Beans

Simple is best, y’all. Simple is best. Add about a Tablespoon of Lea & Perrin’s worcestershire sauce to a pound of lean ground beef. [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change their formulas without warning. Always check your labels!]

Divide into equal balls, and smoosh them right in the pan. If you believe it’s sacrilege to cook burgers on the stove instead of on a grill, I cordially invite you to come stand on my back porch in the 90% humidity, when it’s still 95 degrees even after the sun’s gone down, and count the number of mosquitos that bite you before you come around to my way of thinking.

Are there recipes for making your own GF hamburger buns out there? Sure. And maybe someday I’ll work up the energy to experiment with them. But I figure I do so much cooking and baking as it is, I allow myself to splurge on some of the basics that do have commercially-premade versions available. I’ve honestly found that the amount of money I save by no longer buying dairy products far outweighs the extra cost of a few GF hamburger buns. Cheese is expensive! Anyway, Gillian’s is our favorite brand. Whole Foods carries them, in a little freezer case next to the bakery. The texture is more like a biscuit than a typical hamburger bun, but for what it’s worth it’s a darn good biscuit. These are also especially useful if only some members of the household are eating GFCF, or if you’re trying to host non-GFCF guests at a cookout, because you can just heat up one at a time as you need. Just remember, if you toast your buns, never do it in the same pan or grill that you toasted the gluten buns on!

The burgers ought to be done after about 7 minutes per side over medium heat, but to be honest I never really pay that close attention. I just busy myself with pulling out all the fixings, slicing the tomato, warming up the buns and cutting them in half… and round about the time I’m finished the burgers are too. Do pay attention to your brands, as there are unsafe versions of all of these condiments. If you’re one of those heathens who puts mayonnaise on burgers, go for Hellman’s. It’s not pictured here because I’ve raised my children right, you see.

And if you just can’t have a burger without cheese, you can always go for rice cheese slices. I wouldn’t, but you (and the GFCF Husband) certainly could.

Happy Eating!

Hamburgers

1 lb. lean ground beef
1 TBS Lea & Perrin’s worcestershire sauce
1 pkg. Gillian’s GF French rolls
Heinz ketchup
French’s mustard
Hellman’s mayonnaise
Vlasic pickles
tomato
lettuce
onion

I had been pondering this thing for some time, wondering if it could really be as cool as people said it was. I was finally pushed into action when my cousin Stacey revealed it was her new favorite food. (Strictly speaking, she’s my cousin’s wife, but I’ve never heard of a cousin-in-law, have you?) Stacey doesn’t cook GFCF, but she works really hard to make sure her family eats lean, unprocessed foods, which is probably 75% of this diet when you get right down to it. And boy am I glad I listened to her!

Prep it just the way you would any other kind of squash: cut it in half lengthwise and scoop out the seeds. There are several different ways you can cook these things, but it should not surprise you to hear I go for the quick and easy way out, every time. The microwave only has a bad reputation because people put deplorable things inside it and try to pass them off as food. It’s a perfectly legitimate way to cook healthy food too. So put one half of the squash on a plate, with 1/4 cup water poured around the base.

Cover with plastic wrap, and microwave on HIGH for 10 minutes.

Now here comes the magic. Start gently scraping down the length of the squash with a fork, and the whole thing will just fall apart into these strands that look like… spaghetti!

Stand it upright in a bowl while you’re scraping, and you don’t even have to hold it with your other hand. Which is good, because this sucker is hot. If you want, cook your second squash half while you’re doing this, or if you don’t need that much food right now, just wrap it up tightly and stick it in the fridge for up to a week or so.

Keep scraping until the whole thing is hollowed out, then just toss the skin.

At this point it’s as good as cooked pasta, and there are a ton of things you can do with it. For now, we’re going with the most basic: plain old GFCF spaghetti sauce. I’m a fan of all the Classico flavors, I just get whichever one strikes my fancy when I’m at the store. [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change their formulas without warning. Always check your labels!]

I use one whole jar with one whole squash, but I find it’s helpful to pour in about half of the sauce first, and stir gently with a fork to really get all the strands separated and coated evenly with sauce.

Also, you can brown about 1/2 lb. of ground beef if your family prefers a meaty sauce.

Okay, here comes the rest of the sauce, like I promised.

And voila! Now listen, you’re not going to fool anyone into believing this is real spaghetti. It’s got this faint little crispness to it that is not quite like soggy wheat pasta. But if you’re already having to force pasta substitutes on your kids, I guarantee you they will not know this one is a vegetable. There is absolutely no squash flavor to explain away; it’s extremely mild. Just tell them it’s a special rice pasta that’s better than all those other mushy rice pastas, or some entirely new pasta that’s made from a unique blend of gluten-free flours and unicorn dust. Either way, they will devour it and beg for more.

Happy Eating!

Spaghetti Squash Marinara

1 spaghetti squash
1 jar Classico red pasta sauce, any flavor
1/2 lb. ground beef

What was I saying? Oh yes: meat. A basic, well-seasoned piece of meat is such a rarity these days, people will think you’re some sort of brilliant gourmet for serving it, and marvel at your minimalist elegance. This here is about 2 pounds of beef brisket, with a dry rub of spices pressed into it. What spices you ask? Well, it’s brown sugar, paprika, chili powder, salt, and pepper. 2 Tablespoons each. What I like to do is mix all the spices on the surface of a large plate, and then just lay the meat down on the plate on all sides. I really should have gotten a picture of this, I know, but my hands were all covered in meat juice, and then one of the kids needed something, and somehow I got distracted and forgot.

Anyway, if you’ve got the time to let your meat sit with the spice rub for a few hours, great; if not, don’t sweat it. When you’re ready, place the brisket in a dutch oven or crock pot (but really, a dutch oven is better. I won’t quibble about the color, they have red and brown, too, if for some strange reason you don’t agree with me that my blue one is the most beautiful thing ever. The important thing is that enamel surface on the inside.) Make sure you lay the meat fat side up.

Pour in about 1 1/2 cups of Pacific Foods beef broth. [As always, my brands were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change formulas without notice. Always check your labels.] If necessary, add some water to the pot until the liquid is at least an inch deep, and make sure to lift the edges of the meat a bit so it can flow underneath. Then just put the lid on and stick it in a 325 degree oven for 3-4 hours (or set your crock pot to high for that amount of time, if you insist on doing it that way.)

Man, I wish I could tell you how good my house smells right now. When it’s time for dinner, just drench the top of your meat in Sweet Baby Ray’s barbecue sauce. There are other GFCF barbecue sauces available too, but as a Texan, I have to tell you: this stuff is the real deal. If it’s available in your area, this is the product you want.

See? That is some fine barbecue brisket right there. Serve this with smashed potato salad, and you’ll have a positively mouth-watering meal that no one will even suspect is GFCF.

Happy Eating!

Brisket

2 TBS brown sugar
2 TBS McCormick’s paprika
2 TBS McCormick’s chili powder
2 TBS salt
2 TBS pepper
1-2 lbs. beef brisket
1 1/2 cups Pacific Foods beef broth
1 cup Sweet Baby Ray’s barbecue sauce

Okay, that’s a lie. I liked it better the old way, full of delicious refined flours and sugars. But that’s just my neuroreceptors talking, pay them no mind. I do think this way is better than with a gluten-free pie crust, at least. My philosophy with this diet is that it’s almost always better to just avoid rather than replace. Less disappointment that way.

First, chop up an onion.

Next, we’re going to start making the gravy mix. I used to use a beef stew spice packet for this, but wouldn’t you know, there’s basically no such thing as a gluten-free spice packet. So we’ll just make our own. That’s 1/4 cup Bob’s Red Mill All-Purpose Gluten-Free Flour. You can tell I use it all the time because it gets its own canister on my counter.

Then add 1 teaspoon of salt, 1/8 teaspoon pepper, 1/2 teaspoon ground ginger, and 1/8 teaspoon allspice. See how lazy I am, just eyeballing half a quarter teaspoon, instead of getting a new measuring spoon out? Sometimes I like to tell myself I’m just being more efficient, that’s all.

Now this is 1/8 teaspoon of paprika. I like to sprinkle more paprika on top of the dish to make it look pretty, but if your kids don’t like bright red speckles on their food, you could make it a 1/4 teaspoon here instead.

If you want to be all gourmet, you could boil actual potatoes and mash them yourself. I’m going with the instant flakes tonight. Lazy, lazy, lazy am I. So this is 2 2/3 cups water, 2/3 cup almond milk, 4 Tablespoons Fleischmann’s margarine, and 1 teaspoon salt, according to the directions on the Betty Crocker Potato Buds box. [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change formulas without notice. Always check your ingredient lists.]

Meanwhile, start sauteeing the onions in a little olive oil and breaking up 1 lb. ground beef in a large pan. I always use the extra lean beef so I don’t have to worry about draining off grease. Ew.

When the meat is starting to brown but not done yet, throw in about a cup of frozen vegetables. Peas and carrots are the more traditional Shepherd’s Pie ingredients, but corn and green beans were what I had on hand tonight. This is the kind of recipe that begs for random things to be tossed in, so go wild.

Once all the meat is cooked through and the veggies are warm, dump in the flour mixture and stir until everything is coated evenly.

Then start slowly adding water to the pan, stirring constantly. You want to add just enough to make a thick gravy, not a soup. It’s usually about a cup and a half, but don’t hold me to that.

Move the meat mixture into a greased 9×9 pan and smooth it out into a nice layer. Dump your prepared potatoes right on top.

Spread out the potato layer with the back of a spoon, just like you were putting frosting on brownies. Or, you know, on a pie. (Can a pie have frosting, you ask skeptically? I submit that a meringue pie does.)

Sprinkle the top with the remaining 1/8 tsp paprika if you’re into that sort of thing, then pop it in a 350 degree oven just long enough to warm everything through, about 15-20 minutes.

Happy Eating!

Crustless Shepherd’s Pie

1/4 cup Bob’s Red Mill All-Purpose GF flour
1 tsp salt
1/8 tsp pepper
1/2 tsp ground ginger
1/8 tsp allspice
1/4 tsp paprika, divided
1 medium onion, chopped
1 lb. ground beef
about 6 cups mashed potatoes
1 cup frozen vegetables
1 1/2 cups water

I know, everyone’s got a meatloaf recipe, but this one’s tried-and-true. And more importantly, it has a few subtle alterations that make it GFCF.

Start with 1/4 cup crushed Rice Chex cereal. [As always, manufacturers can change formulas without notice. Always check your ingredient lists.]

Crack in one egg.

And add 1/4 cup of… well, liquid. I’m using water here, because I was out of everything else I might normally use. Seriously, everything. Of course I didn’t realize that until I was at this point in cooking, but I had hungry kids and had to make do. I suppose I could hide my shame from you and re-photograph the meatloaf recipe on a night when I didn’t screw it up, but then you might get some notion that things always work smoothly around here. One of the biggest barriers to starting this diet is thinking that everyone else out there is some Baking SuperMom with a spotless 1950s apron, and you are the only one who can’t hack it, but that’s just not true. Anyone can do it, even those of us who can’t remember to go to the grocery store on a timely basis. 

But normally, I get super-sneaky at this point and use pureed vegetables for my liquid. The kids don’t even know they’re eating them. The store has these perfect GFCF veggie purees in little single-serving jars, all ready to go… stocked in the baby aisle. That’s right–I put baby food in my recipes. Check your brands to be sure, but the majority of them contain nothing but the pureed vegetable and water. Butternut squash or sweet potatoes are the easiest to sneak in, but you can even try for something more hardcore like peas if your kids won’t notice the slight color change. Maybe it’s a disciplinary cop-out, but it is so much easier than fighting with them about how many bites of vegetables they’re going to eat tonight.

I also add a Tablespoon of dried minced onion. This stuff is effectively a spice; it doesn’t count as a vegetable at all. See, says right on the label: THIS PRODUCT HAS NO SIGNIFICANT NUTRITIONAL VALUE. That always cracks me up, I have no idea why.

1/2 teaspoon of basil…

1/2 teaspoon of salt…

And 1/4 teaspoon of pepper to round out the spices.

Then two Tablespoons of Heinz ketchup. Technically, ketchup is a pureed fruit, so you could fairly call this a “fruit and vegetable meatloaf,” if you wanted. But then your kids might suspect you were duping them. Better to call it “Meatloaf with No Vegetables In It, No Sirree.”

I love food that retains the shape of its container. I don’t know how old I was before I figured out that cranberry sauce isn’t naturally shaped like a can. Anyway, this is 1 pound of ground beef, shaped like a little plastic-wrapped tube.

Mix well.

And smoosh it into your meatloaf pan. Make sure you spray it with canola oil first, or you’ll be hard at work scrubbing it clean later. Bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes.

The final product isn’t very pretty, but meatloaf never is. The kids are gonna cover it in ketchup anyway, right?

Happy Eating!

Your Basic Meatloaf

1/4 cup crushed Rice Chex
1 egg
1 jar GF baby food (butternut squash)
1 TBS dried minced onion
1/2 tsp basil
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
2 TBS Heinz ketchup
1 lb. ground beef