Now for one of my many dirty little secrets: I love the kind of cranberry sauce that comes in a can. Always have. It is more like cranberry jello than cranberry sauce… which is awesome. But the new me couldn’t accept all the chemicals that typically go into that sort of thing. Strictly speaking, you can easily make the canned version just by making this jello recipe with bottled cranberry juice. But I’ve come up with this half-breed jellied cranberry sauce that I really like, so I’m going to show you how to make that here. I guess we’ll find out if I’m the only one who likes it! First, we have to make some traditional cranberry sauce, so start with a ten-ounce package of frozen cranberries, and dump 1 full cup of sugar on top.

Add 1 cup of water, and stir it all around. Another option is to use one cup of orange juice instead, which is a great flavor if you’re going the traditional route, but it does change the texture quite a bit if you go on to make my mock-can preparation, so you have to decide in advance which one you’re going to make.

Boil for about 10 minutes, until the skins of the cranberries begin to pop.

As it cools, it will thicken and goo-ify. Bet you won’t find that term in the Joy of Cooking glossary. Now, you can be a curmudgeonly coward and stop here, serving up a perfectly traditional but classy cranberry sauce. Or you can be a wild, modern trend-setter, and read on for something completely different.

First, make your sauce smooth in a blender or food processor.

There are probably still going to be some small bits, which I suppose you could try to strain out if you really wanted. Then, pour your puree into a large bowl.

Sprinkle one packet of Knox gelatin over the entire surface.

Pour in one cup of boiling water…

…and stir quickly to make sure all the gelatin dissolves.

Pour it into whatever container you want it to set in. These round tupperware containers are my homage to the metal can, of which I have precisely zero available in my kitchen.

Let it set in the fridge for several hours, and voila: jellied cranberry sauce! Fair warning, you may have to thwack pretty hard on the bottom of the container to get it to come out like this. But you could also leave it in the container — this stuff is still a bit spreadable, kind of like a very thick jam, which is the way I like it.

And while you’re planning your Thanksgiving table, don’t forget these great recipes:

Thanksgiving Turkey
Deviled Eggs
Sweet Potato and Apple Bake
Mashed Potatoes
Green Bean Casserole
Corn Casserole
Pumpkin Pie

Happy Thanksgiving!

Cranberry Sauce

10-ounce bag frozen cranberries
1 cup sugar
1 cup water (or 1 cup orange juice)

Optional:
1 packet Knox gelatin
1 cup boiling water

So I’m busily living in sweat-laden denial, and that includes getting into the mood for all these great autumn foods that are coming down the pipeline. Heck, it’ll probably still be swelteringly hot on Thanksgiving Day anyway, so why not start enjoying them now? Anachronistic food is not a crime.

.

It should come as no surprise that this recipe contains apples, specifically the Granny Smith variety. I really like them with the peels on, but I understand if you have to take them off. Either way, cut three apples into wedges (minus the cores) and set them aside.

.

Peel two sweet potatoes, and cut them into rounds about 3/4 inch thick. Then cut each round into fourths, so you end up with a bunch of little pizza-slice shapes.

.

Does the shape honestly matter? No, but it makes arranging them easier if they’re all the same. And while we’re being honest, this alternating-line arrangement isn’t really necessary either. But it sure does look pretty, doesn’t it? Note that I did grease this pan with a little coconut oil before going all Martha Stewart on it.

.

Next, take 1 cup of apple juice (the cloudy kind that comes in a glass jar is best, it means it’s the least-processed) and gently pour it into the baking dish among the apple and sweet potato pieces.

.

Now, measure out 1/3 cup of brown sugar, and mix in 1 teaspoon of cinnamon…

.

And 1/8 teaspoon of nutmeg. I just eyeballed half of a quarter teaspoon for this one, rather than go hunting for my tiny measuring spoons. Close enough for government work.

.

Blend the three together, then sprinkle your sugar mixture evenly over the baking dish. You can’t sprinkle such tiny amounts of cinnamon and nutmeg over such a large dish, see, that’s why we mixed them into the sugar first.

.

Now, layer about 1/2 cup of pecan pieces over the top. Have I mentioned before how hard it is to photograph plastic bags? I swear I must have taken a dozen shots before I got one where the flash wasn’t reflecting awkwardly off the bag and making it unreadable. But because I love all of you, I persevered.

.

Bake uncovered in a 350 degree oven for 1 hour. Then crank up your A/C and pretend it’s jacket weather out there.

.

Happy Eating!

.

Sweet Potato and Apple Bake

3 Granny Smith apples
2 sweet potatoes
1 cup apple juice
1/3 cup brown sugar
1 tsp cinnamon
1/8 tsp nutmeg
1/2 cup pecan pieces

.

We start by hardboiling three eggs. (They should spend 15 minutes at a full rolling boil, if you don’t happen to keep egg timing tables in a readily accessible part of your brain.)

.

Peel the eggs and slice them in half, then gently pop out the yolks. They’re not part of this recipe, so you can toss them, or mix in some mayo for a sandwich spread, or even sprinkle on a little salt and snack on them while you’re cooking. That’s what I always end up doing. I’m sure my arteries are so grateful to me.

.

Meanwhile, cut the whites lengthwise again, then cross-cut into thirds. Or whatever, just get them bite-sized.

.

Slice and dice about half a cucumber.

.

And do the same with two roma tomatoes.

.

Now, the critical question: what dressing to use? Generally speaking, we’re going for an Italian flavor here. (Notice how the salad is a lovely red, white, and green? That’s no accident, my friend.) There are a lot of GFCF Italian dressings out there, but then again, there are a lot that aren’t. Personally, I’m in love with Brianna’s New American dressing, which is basically a thick balsamic vinaigrette. It’s darn tasty, whatever national heritage it wants to claim. [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change formulas without warning. Always check your labels!]

.

Drizzle with impunity, toss lightly, and dig in! Another option is to substitute tofu for the egg whites, if you happen to be vegan, or just like the taste of tofu. I don’t fall into either category, but I promise I won’t judge. Well, not very harshly, at any rate.

.

Happy Eating!

.

The GFCF Lady’s Cucumber Tomato Salad

3 hardboiled eggs
1/2 cucumber
2 roma tomatoes
3-4 Tbs Brianna’s New American dressing

.

An important part of this dish is the texture: it should be smooth, almost like a gravy. So to that end, we’re going to do something a little special and actually blend this chopped onion into a fine pulp. Onions contain a fair amount of water, so you ought to be able to do this in a regular blender if you want.

.

Next, pour the onion puree into a large, deep pan and start sauteeing it gently. You can add a little oil if you want, but you may find it’s not necessary since we’ve gone and released all the liquid from the onion already. Incidentally, this trick will work for a wide variety of dishes if your kids don’t like onions.

.

Add in one Tablespoon of minced ginger…

.

1/4 teaspoon of cumin…

.

and 1/4 teaspoon of cinnamon.

.

While your onion paste is cooking, chop up 2 medium tomatoes, then dump the whole cutting board’s worth into the pan, seeds and all.

.

Turn the heat up a bit and stir frequently for 10-15 minutes. The goal is for the tomatoes to disintegrate completely. Also toss in 1 teaspoon of McCormick garam masala when you get a second. Don’t be thrown off by the foreign name; it’s a common spice blend and you’ll easily find it in your grocery store. But like all blends, cheapo-brands may try to cut it with plain flour, so be careful. [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change formulas without warning. Always check your labels!]

.

Stirring, stirring, stirring. This is a good cooking task to let a kid help out with, because it’s so shallow they’ll have a really hard time sloshing any over the side of the pan.

.

Okay, we got the “Indian” part, now for the “Kidney Bean” part. You can use two cans of drained and rinsed beans, or go all out and cook your own (starting with 2 cups of dry beans.) If you use canned, double-check that they contain nothing but beans, water, and salt. Most brands are going to be plain like this, but every once in awhile you’ll find one that includes “natural flavors,” or unidentified seasonings… all sorts of potentially-glutenous crap. Why? Beats me. Just sell us beans, for Pete’s sake.

.

Finally, add in roughly 1/2 teaspoon of salt. Canned beans will already have a certain amount of salt added, so go with your tastebuds on this one. It’s a very rough estimate.

You can serve this as a main dish with rice as is traditional, or make it a fantastic side. It’s especially good as a pot luck dish, if you ever find yourself attending that sort of thing.

.

Happy Eating!

.

Indian Kidney Beans (Rajma)

1 onion
1 Tbs minced ginger
1/4 tsp cumin
1/4 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp McCormick garam masala
2 tomatoes
2 cans (about 4 cups) cooked kidney beans
1/2 tsp salt

Anyway, my nightly cooking has reflected this uncontained chaos, and the truth is I haven’t been cooking much at all, let alone trying to experiment with new recipes. On the other hand, I was forced to be a little more creative most nights given my lack of time, and did actually manage to throw together something that turned out unexpectedly great.

.

First, start grilling two chicken breasts in a pan with a little olive oil. Make sure you are looking at something more important when you season them, so you waste a bunch of salt and pepper in the pan like I did. Don’t be nervous about seasoning without measurements, it’s only salt and pepper. Just make it look like the picture does.

Resist the urge to turn them too early; you want the cooked part to be crawling more than halfway up the sides, and the underside to be good and browned before you flip them over.

.

Meanwhile, start boiling about 4-8 ounces of gluten-free pasta. Given the color I’d say mine was at least partially corn-based, but the truth is I have no idea what brand this was.

.

After it’s cooked and drained, drizzle 2 Tablespoons of olive oil in and stir well. I’d blame the steam for the blurry photo, but really it was just my unsteady hands.

.

Now then: lazy secret ingredient number one. This is a random jar I found near the spaghetti sauces in my grocery store. It’s basically chopped up artichokes, garlic, oil, and salt. I think it’s supposed to get dolloped onto little toasty rounds of bruschetta at a fancy dinner party or something. But instead, I scooped about 1/2 cup of it directly into my pasta. I bet your store has something similar. Of course you should always be extra careful to check the label on any unfamiliar foods you buy.

.

And lazy secret ingredient number two, a pre-made pico de gallo, which you may remember seeing before. I’m nothing if not consistent. Adding in the mango bits is a local thing, but if you’re too far north of the border to get anything remotely like this, you could always make your own. It’s literally just one red onion, one tomato, one small jalapeno, (one mango,) and a little cilantro, diced finely. I think I probably dumped in about a cup. I was not measuring this evening, believe me.

.

Around this time your chicken breasts should be close to being done.

.

Cut them into slices, lay them neatly across your bowls of pasta, and you might even get away with looking like you put some effort into this.

.

Happy Eating!

.

The GFCF Lady’s Artichoke Pasta

2 chicken breasts
salt and pepper
4 ounces gluten-free pasta
2 TBS olive oil
1/2 cup diced artichoke mix
1 cup pico de gallo

.

Okay, it’s not quite so simple right at the very beginning, I admit. There’s a fair number of ingredients in the sauce. But it’s extremely simple once the sauce is put together, and the thing is, this sauce will last in the fridge for up to a month or more, so you could make a big batch and have it handy in a jar for those nights when you’re in borderline-collapsing mode.

We start with a veritable Who’s Who lineup of Asian sauce ingredients: 1 1/2 Tablespoons of rice vinegar, 1/4 cup sesame oil, 3 Tablespoons soy sauce (or a reasonable substitute,) and 2 cloves of minced garlic.

.

This is a case where an immersion blender will definitely come in handy, but you can get away with doing it in a traditional blender if that’s all you have. After assembling the first set of liquid ingredients, add some crushed red pepper flakes, depending on your spice tolerance. 1/4 teaspoon is a good average place to start, noticeable in flavor but not too hot. My tastebuds have been dulled by years of Mexican food, so I put in 3/4 tsp for a real kick. But to balance it out, we’ll also add 1 teaspoon of sugar, and 1/3 cup of water.

.

Lastly, dump in 1/2 cup of dry-roasted, unsalted cashews. Raw cashews will work too, just make sure you don’t get any that are “honey-roasted” or otherwise coated in junk.

.

The cashews are the reason you’d rather use the immersion blender here, because it’s going to get all those tiny nut pieces nice and smooth. Ultimately, we’re going to add some more whole cashews to the meal, so a little graininess shouldn’t be too distracting, but another alternative is to use about 1/3 cup prepared cashew butter instead of the whole cashews.

.

Once you’re done blending, your sauce is ready for the plate or the mason jar, whichever you prefer. I vote plate, because I’m not very good at delayed gratification. These here are some Schar gluten-free noodles. They’re made with a mixture of corn and rice flours, so they’re a little starchier and firmer to chew than straight-up rice noodles, which is nice.

.

The drawback is, like most blended-flour GF noodles, they release a ton of that starch into the cooking water, so you may find you have to drain, rinse, and refill the pot halfway through the cooking process. But it doesn’t add more than 2-3 minutes to the cooking process.

.

While your pasta is boiling, finely chop 1 1/2 cups of fresh cilantro, also known as coriander.

.

Mix the cilantro and the cashew sesame sauce into your drained noodles, and stir gently.

.

And finally, garnish with another 1/2 cup or so of cashews for crunch. This simple little noodle dish may look light and unassuming, but it is surprisingly filling, and makes great leftovers too, either cold or hot. If you’ve never sent real leftovers in your child’s lunchbox, this might be just the meal to start with.

.

Happy Eating!

.

Cashew Sesame Noodles

1 1/2 TBS rice vinegar
1/4 cup Asian sesame oil
3 TBS soy sauce
2 cloves garlic
1/4 tsp crushed red pepper flakes
1 tsp sugar
1/3 cup water
1/2 cup + 1/2 cup dry roasted cashews
12 oz. GF spaghetti noodles
1 1/2 cups chopped cilantro

.

First thing you’ll want to do is cut up about 6 slices of bacon into fairly small pieces. Make sure your bacon is gluten-free, and preferably nitrate/nitrite free as well. I like Hormel Natural Choice, myself. [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change formulas without warning. Always check your labels!]

.

Sautee the bacon bits in a large pot, or a very deep pan with a lid. I know it looks like overkill now, but the need for all that pan space will become evident in a moment.

.

Once the pieces are nice and crispy, scoop them out with a slotted spoon, and set them aside on a paper towel to drain.

.

Use the bacon fat remaining in the pan to sautee one onion, and two cloves of minced garlic. See, we’re using every part of the bacon, just like the ancient tribes of… no, nevermind. It’s because it’s delicious, that’s why.

.

While that’s cooking, take two bunches of kale, and cut out the main stem from each leaf by running your knife right down both sides of it. Chop the leaves into fairly large pieces, and lightly drop it all into the pan. It should take up a lot of space, kind of like a giant bowl of salad that you happen to have sitting on the stove.

.

Gently turn the pile for about a minute, until the leaves are bright green and well-coated in bacon-ness. Please note that the right way to do this is with tongs. As long as you don’t actually touch the bottom of the pan, you probably won’t burn your fingers. I mean, I did, but I’m sure you’re more careful than I am. Or at least smarter, and thus willing to use tongs.

.

Now pour about 1/4 cup of water into the pan…

.

…and place the lid mostly over the top, leaving a small gap.

.

Six to ten minutes later, you will be stunned at how much your kale has shrunk. But not for long, because you’ll be too busy salivating over the plate of bacon that’s been waiting patiently by your side, like a loyal friend. Ideally, the kale will be soft and wilted, but not overcooked and slimey. Better to take the lid off too early than too late, so keep an eye on it.

.

Let’s not mince words here. You need to eat more vegetables. You want to eat more bacon. Now you don’t have to choose between the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other.

.

Happy Eating!

.

Kale with Bacon and Onion

2 bunches of kale, trimmed
6 slices of bacon
1 onion
2 cloves minced garlic
1/4 cup water

.

If you’ve never tried quinoa (pronounced KEEN-wah,) there’s no better time than right now. Believe me, you’re in for a treat. This pearly little superfood is packed with protein and nutrients, yet is as easy and versatile as rice.

.

This step is not strictly necessary, but it’s a good idea: toasting your quinoa lightly before the actual cooking will greatly enhance the flavor. You can do this the right way, which is to say in a dry skillet on the stove, but I’m lazy and do it in the microwave. Go for one minute at a time, stirring in between, until you start to smell this nice nutty aroma, usually around 3 minutes for 1 cup of dry quinoa. On the stovetop it will take more like 5 minutes, and then you’ll have a dirty pan to wash. Did you resolve to wash extra dishes in the coming new year? Because I sure didn’t.

.

This step, on the other hand, you don’t want to skip, even if you’re pressed for time: rinse the seeds thoroughly under running water. This will wash off the bitter saponin coating that discourages birds and insects from devouring the plant before it ever gets harvested. I won’t tell the birds what they’re missing out on if you won’t.

.

The rest is automatic. Add 2 cups of water to your trusty rice cooker…

.

…and since I’m making this for breakfast, let’s toss in a handful of dried fruit, too. Think of it as an oatmeal substitute — anything you can put on hot cereal, you can put on this hot pseudocereal. Brown sugar, cinnamon, maple, bananas, it’s all good. I like to sprinkle my sugar over the top once it’s done, but you could add a few tablespoons to the cooking water instead for a more infused flavor.

.

Close the lid, hit the button, and go take your shower. Or pack the lunchboxes, or whatever else you do in the morning that doesn’t involve cooking a hot breakfast, because that part’s taken care of.

.

Wasn’t that easy? The final product will be light and fluffy, somewhat similar to couscous. Like I said, this stuff is very versatile. Swap out the fruit and sugar for some curry powder and frozen peas, and you have a fantastic dinner side dish. Or chill it with some leftover chicken and dressing for a pasta salad type thing. The possibilities are endless!

.

Happy Eating!

.

Breakfast Quinoa

1 cup uncooked quinoa
2 cups water
1/3 cup dried cranberries or other fruit
2 TBS brown sugar

.

Start with about a pound and a half of fresh green beans (or go with a bag of pre-cut frozen ones, I’ll never judge,) and boil them with a Tablespoon of salt for 10-15 minutes, until they’re tender. It’s important to salt the water because we won’t be using a canned cream of mushroom soup, so we have to replace at least some of that sodium content your tastebuds will be expecting.

.

Meanwhile, take a 10 ounce package of sliced mushrooms, and slice them some more so the pieces are pretty small.

.

Pour some oil in a very large pan, and begin sauteeing your diced mushrooms along with 3 cloves of minced garlic.

.

Also add 1 Tablespoon of dried chopped onions. You can find this stuff in the seasoning aisle if you’ve never seen it before, or for that matter you could just use onion powder instead.

.

While the mushrooms are softening up (and don’t forget those green beans still cooking in the pot,) scoop out 2 Tablespoons of potato starch into a small cup. You could also use cornstarch if you prefer, but either way make sure you choose a brand that’s pure, not mixed with any other substances.

.

Mix in one Tablespoon of dry cooking sherry…

.

…and 3/4 cup gluten-free chicken broth. Pacific Foods is one good option. [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change formulas without warning. Always check your labels!]

.

Stir it up with a fork until the potato starch is completely dissolved, then pour it into your mushroom pan.

.

It should thicken right up within a minute or two.

.

Once it does, add 3/4 cup of almond milk, and stir well.

.

And that right there is dairy-free cream of mushroom soup! You could of course make that little mixture on a larger scale and serve it in bowls, if that strikes your fancy. But today, it’s getting a bunch of drained green beans dumped in instead.

.

Also add in 1/2 teaspoon of pepper, and 2 teaspoons of salt.

.

Pack it all into a 9 x 9 baking dish, and sprinkle flat-slivered almonds over the top. Classy and traditional. Bake it uncovered for 20 minutes at 350 degrees, and those almonds will become toasted and crispy: the perfect topping to the perfect side dish.

.

Happy Eating!

.

Green Bean Casserole

1 1/2 lbs. green beans
1 TBS salt
10 oz. mushrooms
3 cloves minced garlic
1 TBS dried chopped onions (or onion powder)
2 TBS potato starch
1 TBS dry sherry
3/4 cup GF chicken broth
3/4 cup almond milk
1/2 tsp pepper
2 tsp salt
3/4 cup flat-slivered almonds

.

Mind you, even a modern, fancy carrot salad still has to have shredded carrots in it. I’m not reinventing the wheel here. Start with a 10-ounce bag, or about 3 cups.

.

And of course, raisins. Most brands are fine, but on rare occasion you might find one that is dusted with flour to prevent sticking, so double-check that your package says it contains nothing but raisins. (Many also contain the preservative sulphur dioxide, which, while not a source of gluten, also ain’t so good for you in the long run. All natural is the way to go.)

You know how, when you were a kid, there was always that one house that gave out boxes of raisins at Halloween, instead of something good? Heck, in my neighborhood we had a dentist who actually gave out toothbrushes, the old Scrooge. (Don’t question my cross-holiday metaphors, I’m working here.) Anyway, I don’t know if it’s lingering childhood bitterness, or a genuine tastebud aversion, but for whatever reason I actually really don’t like raisins. So I use golden raisins here instead, about 1/2 cup to be specific. But don’t let my prejudices cloud your own judgment; if you’d prefer to stick with the traditional dark raisins, I won’t hold it against you.

.

Now pour in about 1 cup of Minute Maid Original orange juice. [As always, the brands I use were GFCF at the time of posting, but manufacturers can change formulas without warning. Always check your labels!] Aside from avoiding brands that contain gluten (and there are some!) it’s also probably best to avoid any orange juice that is fortified with calcium, rather than try to figure out whether that calcium came from a non-dairy source. Or better yet, you could just squeeze some actual oranges — you know, juice them, as it were.

.

Pack everything down so that the liquid comes to the top of the carrots. Then cover the bowl and refrigerate for several hours, to allow both the raisins and the carrots to soak up that lovely orange flavor. The raisins will actually swell and become kind of plump again, it’s neat.

.

When you’re closer to meal time, measure out about 1/2 cup of walnut pieces and toast them until they’re light and crispy. The easiest way to do this is to pop them in the microwave for a minute at a time until they’re done. You can also do it in a dry pan on the stovetop, or even on a tray in the oven, but both of those take longer and are more likely to burn the nuts.

.

Drain the excess orange juice from the carrot mixture, then toss in the toasted walnuts and serve. And here’s a tip: switch out those raisins for dried cranberries, and this becomes a perfect GFCF Thanksgiving side dish.

.

Happy Eating!

.

The GFCF Lady’s Carrot Raisin Salad

3 cups shredded carrots
1/2 cup raisins
1 cup orange juice
1/2 cup walnut pieces